"YO, IT'S ME, B-MONEY"

so, there is a guy that lives nearby. he calls himself "b-money." he also tries to sell people useless cell phone/internet plans. in fact, he tried to convince my roommates that his plan was better than the one we were using because we "would all be on the same plan!" his logic astonished even me. i mean, that would be awesome. forget having digital cable with a blazing internet connection for the same price as his plan. if we were all united in our cell phone plan we would be unstoppable. we would become "the fantastic five."

ok, enough of that. i saw him walking by yesterday and i thought of the music video he made.



i dont know what else to say.

SENIORITIS

i did it. i totally just dropped ALL of my classes. i no longer go to byu. and the best part, i will still graduate in april.

so i decided to go to work today at about noon. ya know, just cuz. i have no classes today and i work part time. so what on earth did i do all morning? this:



whaaa? what is this? well, maybe you should see part one.




i am such a nerd.

YET ANOTHER MISADVENTURE IN FAST FOOD

today i tried the philly cheese steak burger at carl's jr. and decided i like it. how ever, this wasnt the first time i have eaten this burger. the first time i was too hungry to give an unbiased opinion. i had the 'shakes.' but this isnt because i am hypoglycemic (some times i do wonder, tho). no, it all started on a friday morning early last december while i was at work.

i was the only one at work besides my boss when my boss's boss's co-worker comes in and tells my boss to pick up a bale of straw for him. of course, he then delegates to me. so i figure i can leave at about 11:30 am, pick up the bale and then pick up something for lunch on my way back to work.

so i head out to a place called 'intermountain farmers association' (or some thing like that) out by the train tracks in provo. it turns out that they dont have any in stock. but they do have a shipment coming in later in the week. but that doesnt help me, so they suggest i go to some other place in spanish fork. but they dont give very good directions. so i make a wrong turn and have to turn around about 2 miles down the road.

i find the store. it is a lot like home depot and goodwill rolled into one convenient warehouse. it is like the opposite of a farmer's market. at first i felt a little out of place. but then i realized that i am wearing flannel and i have a beard. so i grab a shopping cart and head in.

i ask a store employee if they have any bales of straw and she says "ummm, i think all of the straw is gone. we wont get any for a while because all of the farmers are saving what they have for their own animals. so, your best bet would be to drive around the farms and ask if you can buy a bale off of them." i was less than thrilled about that proposition. i had no idea that there was a shortage of straw in december. but i would have expected my boss's boss's co-worker to know about it.

luckily, people in spanish fork are friendly. friendly enough to eaves drop on my conversation with the clerk and tell me a better way to get a bale of straw. a man with his wife actually calls his buddy to see if he has any straw. which he does. so now i have two options. i can either try to find this dude's farm in the middle of nowhere. or wait for him to make his delivery to another 'intermountain farmers association' store. i decide to try the store idea since i am using the company credit card and i dont expect a farmer to have a swipe machine at his farm house. just a hunch.

so the man and wife give me fairly good directions to the store and i am on my way. by this time i am really hungry. it is well after my usual lunch time. so i keep my eye open for any food establishments on my way to the store. as i follow the directions i notice my last turn a little too late. no worries, i tell myself. i can just turn around. about three miles down the road i finally find a cross road. right next to a hare krishna temple (which i have actually been to for my 'world religions' class).

so i turn around and go back to the store and pick up the third to last bale of straw they have in stock ($5.35 plus tax, i might add). by this time it is after one o'clock and i am nearly shaking with hunger. i am eyeing various types of bird feed and convince myself that it just isnt worth it. on my way back to the freeway i spot heaven in fast food form: carl's jr. but the line is insane. but i am too hungry to not stop. blast. so after another 20 minute wait in the drive through line and actually starting to shake with hunger, i finally get my philly cheese steak burger and scarf it down while im driving back to provo.

one week later my boss's boss's co-worker takes the bale of straw from the back of our truck...

INTER NUTS

i dont really have anything to say. but i do have some cool stuff to post.

there is nothing better than combining my two favorite things from childhood: toys and fire. (do not show this to toddlers who watch sesame street.)



this one is in the name of science and a canadian christian church against drug abuse. (some of you may be offended by this.)



you ever wonder what the easter bunny thinks of the people he gives candy to? well, wonder no more. (if you were offended by the last clip, you will definately be offended by this one.)



everyone remembers 9th grade science class where your hippee chemistry teacher got really excited because he finally got access to pure sodium. and then proceeded to drop a chunk of it into a glass of water which instantly exploded. well, i offer you a 'one-up' to that. (no one should be offended by this clip.)



i present to you the next dimitri martin.

/CHUCKLE

i just witnessed two middle aged men do the following: take ten feet of packaging bubble wrap and lay it on the floor; walk all over it creating lots of noise for 3 minutes; pick up the completely deflated bubble wrap and throw it away; did not even crack a smile.

contrast that with what i witnessed yesterday: co-worker's wife and one-year old daughter come in to pick him up from work; i pick up some keys and throw them about a foot and a half in the air and catch them; one year old daughter shouts "keeeeeyssssss" and laughs histerically.

i think i fall somewhere in the middle.

ONCE UPON A BLOG

not too long ago i posted some videos that i made. some of those who left comments said that they would be interested in doing an oscar night again. well, i have good news.

i was asked to do another video for the annual 2nd ward oscar night to be played during the judging of the entries. my idea is great. but i need some things. i mostly need people. we will be doing some war scenes with pyrotechnics (dry ice bombs) and everything. i also need an eight year old boy (this is actually really important for the punchline). it is going to be awesome.

if you want to help, let me know.

HOLLY DAYS

yup, there is only one way to describe my break.